El Travel Blog

LOS LISTS - EXPERIENCES (2 of 5)

In the name of Travis’ departure, we’ve compiled a series on our misadventures. It’s an exhaustive, self-indulgent, overly simplified analysis of practically everything we ever did, with no explanation or justification for our choices. 

Top Three Ailments

1. Pink eye

2. Broken finger

3. Slashed wrist (after tripping on volcanic rock while peeing)

Bonus ailment: Perpetual diarrhea

Travis’ Top Three Bowel Movements

1. The Tony Romas Poo (notes: so mighty, took seven flushes, expected a slow clap upon emerging from the stall)

2. The Muchu Poo-chu on Macchu Pichu (note: travis wanted to make sure he got credit for that term)

3. The Salt Flats Jumping Shart (note: everything in the world at that moment was pure white, except Travis’ pants)

Top Tours

1. Salt Flats Tour

2. Star Tour in Chile

3.Chapada Diamentina tour in Lencios

4. Machupicchu

5. Foz de Iguazu

6. Colca Canyon (Erin)

7. Wine tour in Huacachina

8. Nazca lines

9. Lima city tour

Top Activities (15 Way Tie, We Probably Forgot Something But Whatever)

Paragliding in Medellin - Samba lesson in Salvador - Bolivia’s Got Talent talent show - Mud Volcano in Cartagena - Holy parade in Chile - VW Beetle tour of Sacred Valley in Cuzco - Volunteering with kids in Cuzco - Paddle boats in Copacabana - Surfing in Canoa - Gallery hopping in Sau Paulo - Horseback riding in Morro de Sau Paulo - Salt Cathedral in Zipaquera - Dune buggies in Ica - Snorkeling in Cartagena - Samba/Condoble/Capoera performance in Salvador

Notable Markets

1. That one Sunday market in Brazil where we ate tapioca

2. The Flea market in Sau Paulo

3. Mercado Central in Quito

4. Witches market in La Paz

5. Hipster market in Bogota

6. San Pedro market in Cuzco

7. Mercado Central in Sau Paulo

Top Five Dirtiest Moments

1. Day 2 of Salkantay Trek 

2. July

3. Day 3 of Salt Flat Tour

Top Hammock Naps

1. Villa Madalena in Sau Paulo

2. Playa Blanca (Travis)

3. San Pedro hostel

See also:  South America. Yeah. 

You Take Your Car to Work, I’ll Take My Board

After all the Machu Picchu hiking and general Lima crappiness, we were so, so excited for beach time in Ecuador. And we got exactly what we wanted. Canoa, a teeny tiny dirt road coastal town 8 hours from Quito, was perfect. It was hot and sunny and there was good food, fruity cocktails, and plenty of surfer boy eye candy.

We lazed about in hammocks, read our books under brightly colored beach cabanas and slept under mosquito nets and a creaking fan at night. We ate delicious shrimp ceviche, and, don’t worry dear readers, I predictably vomited from food poisoning; I am not meant to love seafood the way I do…

Anyhow by the third day I was feeling well enough to take a surfing lesson, which beat the hell out of my now-aching old timer joints but man is that fun. I could only stand up on las olas pequinas blancas (the little white waves) but the point is I STOOD UP ON A SURF BOARD! MANY TIMES! So that was an accomplishment. Basically the Beach Boys had me in mind when they wrote Surfin Safari, Little Surfer Girl, and Surfin’ U.S.A. Hang ten, and shit, man. Or as they say in Ecuador, “chevere.”